Stuff I saw on the internet last week: "wusband?? hife?? wifesband?!?!?"
Hello, beautiful, and happy Monday! New Monday, just like the old Monday. Existential dread! I’m fine. Let’s look at internet things!
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On last week’s episode of on I Hate It But I Love It, Jocelyn and I began our month of romantic and/or sexy movies by talking about 1999’s The Thomas Crown Affair, because there’s nothing sexier than a rich white man who does whatever he wants, regardless of who gets hurt in the process. And this Wednesday’s episode will be about The Notebook! You should subscribe, if you wanna be cool. (You can subscribe to I Hate It But I Love It in all the usual places, including Apple, Spotify, Stitcher, and Pocket Casts.)
TWEETS!
REDDIT!
Well, this is a good way to ruin your relationship with your daughter forever:
I've never been so disappointed in my life. I told you about safe sex, condoms, birth control. On top of that, you betrayed my trust. You used to tell me everything. I argued with your mother all those times about letting you go to your boyfriend's house because I thought you were responsible and that you would come to me if anything happened. But I was wrong. So from now on, don't talk to me ever again. Anything you want to talk to me about, go tell your mother and have her pass it on to me.
As one commenter said, this guy knew it was wrong because he kept it secret from his wife:
[My best friend] finalized all her applications for law schools but didn’t have enough money to pay for it all. She mentioned it in passing that she has about 60% of the cost but that means she’d have to eat ramen for the next months. So I decided to send her the money. She was extremely grateful and promised to pay it back. I told her not to. My wife found out from a mutual friend that I paid for the application fees and she’s livid that I didn’t consult her. I don’t think I should have since it wasn’t money from our joint account but my individual account. She’s giving me the cold shoulder and she’s now asking for the complete separation of finances.
Fuzzy lil’ caterpillars.
This guy thinks it’s partially his wife’s fault because if she weren’t sick they wouldn’t need to go the doctor anyway:
We needed to be on the road by 1 in the afternoon, and all of a sudden 1 came, then 1:30, then 2:00. She called and texted me several times but I couldn't pick up or respond because, as I said, I was super busy. I finally got off work half an hour after closing and came home to a very angry wife. She said she couldn't believe I would just not contact her about what was going on and leave things up in the air like that - and she was really mad that she had missed an appointment with a specialist that took ages to get into.
Admittedly I got a bit defensive, and I told her that if she didn't have to rely on me to take her, and could drive herself, none of this would be an issue, so it was not my fault alone that she missed her appointment.
Being a parent is accepting that your kids will be into their own stuff! YOU’RE THE ADULT!!
I told my wife that I was sick of feeling like an outsider in my own family and that I’d like it if we could maybe do some designated time that we would do things I liked too. I suggested we could all sit down and learn to play this board game I like, Settlers of Catan. My wife told me that I needed to stop trying to force my stuff down their throat and find a balance somehow. I told her that this IS the balance. I can’t pretend to be interested in things like gossipy TV dramas, soap operas, etc, when that just isn’t me. I’m not a teenage girl. I can’t pretend to be one.
He is 26 years old but his mom massages him everyday to soothe his body pain, his mom prepares all his clothes so after taking a bath he would just wear them, she prepares all his meals, they watch tv together in his room when i'm not around and when i'm in their house his mom never joins in what we're doing. He won't go out of the house if we will not bring his mom with us.
Another man in his 30s who married a teenager because he wanted a bang maid:
Today, I was 7 minutes late as I had to turn off all the lights and get myself together before leaving the house. When I got there, he copped a MAJOR attitude with me for being late. Refused to even speak to me. For being 7 minutes late!!!! I tried to explain that I had to put my shoes on and turn out the lights, but he wouldn't talk to me. The run was very awkward and when we got home, he said that he felt he had every right to be angry, and stomped off upstairs.
I ask if she still feels sick and she has insisted she’s physically ok but I’d never going to “ get over it.” So I kept asking why she didn’t feel well enough to attend the wedding and she said because she wants to be alone with just her and me and just be in each other’s companies.
She begged me not to leave her for the weekend ( I intended to stay at my dad’s house.)
I finally get annoyed because I felt like she was talking about the baby as if it were still here and told her that the baby would never be a living entity and burying herself in covers wouldn’t make it any better.
TUMBLR!
(via rainbow-femme, thread found here.)
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(via gunaerystargarygun.)
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(via ttrustissues.)
TIKTOKS!
Look at this lil’ gremlin.
They clearly stumbled on an ancient ritual of some kind.
This is just very nice.
“If anything, I’m a consolation prize.”
“What’s going on with the Fire Stick?”
Oh man, I really need to adopt another cat.
No tolerance against bullying.
Okay but this is actual magic, right? She’s an incredible witch? How do I get an ostrich to love me like this?
Oh noooooooo.
WHY WON’T CRAIG LET ME GET ANOTHER CAT.
ARTICLES!
I Want a Different Life, ¡Hola Papi!
Has science solved one of history’s greatest adventure mysteries?, National Geographic
The Nightmare Share, The Cut
Samer Recognized A Fart Online, Defector
Here’s What It Was Really Like to Work at a Women’s Website, Medium
That’s all for me today, gorgeous. Talk to you soon.
Love,
Kat
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