"If Pete Davidson drank water"

Nov 02, 2021

Happy Monday, y’all! Yet again, my back betrayed me last week and I had to spend three days lying down. And then I went to get acupuncture for the first time and it was really weird! But I seem to be mostly better now, so all is well. Internet things!

Spooky scary month is over on I Hate It But I Love It

Last week on my podcast, Jocelyn and I closed out spooky scary month by talking about Penny Dreadful, a show that is brilliant in a lot of ways, and not very good in many other ways. And this month, it’s Listener Request Month, beginning this Wednesday with Jurassic Park III! You should subscribe, if you wanna be cool. (You can find I Hate It But I Love It in all the usual places, including Apple, Spotify, Stitcher, and Pocket Casts.)

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TWEETS!

avi steinbach @Muscles__McGee

*me to a close lifelong friend*: how’s your job and also what is it

irene @lanadelslayee

last night i told a customer he looked like “if pete davidson drank water” and then asked him if he gets that a lot and he was like “obviously no one has ever said that to me in my life.”

Aren R. LeBrun @proustmalone

Do people on LinkedIn know that one day we are all going to die

Ben Jenkins @bencjenkins

Do you reckon the queen could identify Mario? Like if you showed the queen a picture of Mario, would she be able to say “that’s Mario”. Genuinely quite torn on this. Apologies if it’s been covered in The Crown.

dalendless shid @real_binkster

Ngl Troy’s dad is completely right in High School Musical. Imagine your son was 2 years away from being in the NBA and he wanted to start doing musicals instead

🍂Autumnal Iris🍁 @Jest_Iris

cheshire cat: we're all mad here me: at me???

REDDIT!

Jeeeeeeeeesus, I would not be able to get over this:

My husband was calling when I walked into the room where my phone on vibrate and charging. I answered and he asked why I didn't answer my sister's calls. I asked why and wether she called him. He said yes then proceeded to tell me he recieved the news of a family members death from her. I was shaking at this point while I was waiting for him to tell me more but he said "guess who!"

Just some A+ parenting right here:

I recently convinced my husband and son to move to Egypt and things have been a little rough. Our son has been fighting left and right. One of the main reasons I wanted to move back was because my parents and I have made peace, but they do not want any Swedish spoken in their presence as it isn't 'their' language. My son knows Arabic as a second language but he refuses to speak it when he doesn't have to, instead speaking in Swedish for most of the time.
My parents have told me they don't like it and I don't like it either, I find it disrespectful and I feel like Sweden isn't part of our lives anymore, so I asked my son if he could stop speaking the language

Yeah… I don’t know what this person’s husband is doing, but he is NOT doing therapy:

However these therapy sessions have been happening for a period of 3 months. And he'd have 2 sessions in just one day. He says he found another therapist which's illogical to me but anyway. he'd stay in the bedroom for hours on end preventing me from coming in. I'm talking 3 to 4 hrs a day and Whenever I walk into the bedroom which was only twice the laptop gets slammed shut and my husband would just stare at me confused.

I love small-stakes problems that get out of hand:

When they asked me, I told them a fake birthday without even knowing the sign associated with it. It turns out, that, based on this information, I'm a Leo. They practically fell all over themselves telling me how much sense that made….
Well, unfortunately, one of my bosses seems to believe that me being a Leo makes me uniquely suited to work on various projects and I've actually landed on some good opportunities because of it. After a presentation to clients, I was recently told that my Leo spirit was really carrying the team through such a difficult deadline. Now I'm genuinely worried that someone is going to figure out my real birthday